A Rant Against AT&T, MCI, Verizon, Sprint And Their Wireless Divisions (My apologies to William Shakespeare) You promise me minutes As if such a thing could bear a price Or be bequeathed as a gift Instead you have robbed me Of my time, my minutes untold Moment upon moment wasted on hold A pox upon you! You invaded my sanctum sanctorum Harping at me to establish an alliance with you Plying your wares, insinuating false promises In honey-toned voices And when I succumb You forsake me Blundering back to your four-way farce Performed in perpetuity amongst you and your ilk Thieves, buffoons, tricksters all If I could but denounce thee Slash these wires, Abandon these instruments and flee Alas! Such an act is beyond me.